Enjoy Yourself at Boring Events
Social functions can be fun if you are among friends you enjoy. They can be excruciating it you attend an event with mostly strangers and you are inhibited or bored. We often feel ill-at-ease, focusing on how we may appear to others.
A key concept is to stop thinking of how you are performing, how interesting you are, or the impression you are making. .I’ve learned a better way to enjoy myself at social events that never fails me.:
Focus on others to help them feel at ease.
One December evening, my husband and I attended the Christmas party at a company where he was newly hired as a manager. I would be introduced to the chief executive officer and his staff. I was nervous about making a good impression so carefully selected my clothes and fussed with my hair.
As we arrived and entered the event at a hotel ballroom, we met several people and then Ron was engaged in a conversation about business. I looked around for someone to talk with. Everyone seemed to be acquainted with each other. Maybe I could strike up a conversation with someone else standing alone who was as uncomfortable as I was. But who?
There! Across the room a quiet woman stood with drooping shoulders, hugging her drink, and looking forlorn. Aha! She was my target. I headed over, we exchanged first names, and to start conversation I mentioned a recent funny incident with our dog at the veterinarian. Her eyes immediately lit up, her posture straightened; she nodded and blurted out, “I love animals! We raise horses!”
I asked her to tell me about the horses and spent the next thirty minutes learning details on raising purebred Arabian horses, how to breed and show them, their various personalities, and laughing constantly with her as she transformed into a vivacious woman before my eyes.
We were having a grand time when the company CEO moved to the front table and banged his spoon on a glass to get our attention. Then he nodded at my companion and said, “Honey, come on up; we are about to begin. It is time to be seated.” The woman hugged me, thanked me for our wonderful conversation, and then she walked up to the head table to be seated by the CEO. My new friend was the wife of the CEO.
A few days later he stopped by my husband’s office to tell him how much his wife enjoyed meeting me. I later learned she was suffering from deep depression and that our Christmas party conversation lifted her spirits for the first time in weeks.
I’ve met amazing people at events by approaching someone who appears awkward, uncertain, or lonely. They consistently turn out to be engaging, interesting people.
Many people, regardless of how confident they appear, are dealing with challenges on some level. Simply be present with them, encourage them to talk about their life, family, work, or hobbies. Listen with full attention. Let countless encouraging sparks fly out from you.
Once you develop this skill, you will find it works with most people you meet in social, family, or work situations.
When we purposefully seek to befriend others, we share our divine light with them, igniting their light.
We literally feed light to each other, resulting in expanded radiance for both of us.
